"Simone" and "Sam" have been forced to go on the Lam, after some sloppy security work exposed them to their potential "enemies". Fortunately, they've found help through the SBPP.
("Sex Bloggers Protection Program"). Follow their adventures here until its safe for them to resume their prior alter-egos.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

SBPP Logistics Coordinator Vets Supply List for Bloggers on Lam

As Logistics Specialist for those entering the Sex Bloggers Protection Program, I try to make the change from one location to another as smooth as possible for out clients. Transportation, housing, clothing, communication, food and water must all be carefully considered. However, as I arranged  for a high altitude emergency parachute drop of an Hitachi Magic Wand for Mistress Simone the day after their departure from whence they came, it occurred to me that perhaps I had failed to address a very basic need for sex bloggers, an emergency supply of sex toys and tools.

I make it a practice to rely on only top-notch professionals for advice on caring for those in this essential program, so to assist me in pulling together the EPSTT, Emergency Pack of Sex Toys and Tools, I requested assistance from the unflappable Karla of Eden Fantasys. Kayla was understandably honored to be included as a consultant for this important venture and within a matter of a few hours we had assembled this list of necessary supplies. 

 We begin with The Super Sex Sling. Adjustable to accommodate any size of either male or female sub, this sling is quite helpful in holding  limbs in alignment for perfect penetration. For those new to, and perhaps a tad sore from, transportation by yak and camel, this will be all the rage.   

Next Kayla suggested the Spread "Em Bar & Cuff Set.  In a situation where space is a consideration, this is the multipurpose tool. Wrist cuffs, ankle cuffs, spreader bars, it's an all in one proposition here.

Next we addressed the flogging, cropping and paddling needs. Here are the  three items that were proposed. The, and the Why these particular models you may ask? I think it has something to do with the the multipurpose nature of each one.

The barbed flogger might also be used as a festive whip for yaks and goats on special holidays.  

This rose crop might be also be considered an attractive accent for holding between ones teeth when dancing the tango.

And the fur lined paddle can be used as a new dusting tool from Swiffer. I have seen it on the As Seen on TV channel late at night. is the bullet variety and the other a simultaneous clit and g-spot variety. These are attractive enough in their pretty pink to be use as a focal point on a dresser or coffee table.

And last, but never least, we have the toy that started it all, The Hitachi Magic Wand, which was originally developed as a muscle massager but, according to Wikipedia," the Magic Wand is far more famous for its use as a sex toy, it is usually applied to the vulvar area or anus for erotic stimulation and can be used by both sexes, jointly and separately. Some physicians recommend it for women to increase genital sensitivity and enhance arousal."  And should the need arise, you could use it to loosen up those tight muscles in your neck and back. Right?

By rounding out the EPSTT with some high quality lube and anti-bacterial toy cleaner and we should be able to get the sex bloggers through their first day or maybe two on the lam without too much difficulty.

Your SBPP Logistician,


Donna said...

Hi Sam,

Hope your efforts today to allow local herdsmen to band together is successful.


Mistress and Slave on the Lam said...

Thanks, Donna.....we're hunkered down here, trying to introduce notions of democracy here in Who-Gives-A-Hoot-Stan. But rather than putting an ink blot on the thumbs of folks who have already voted, there is a rogue election official who thinks it would be better just to cut off the thumb.

Talk about voter suppression!


WC said...

Very funny and cool

And very funny comment too Sam

Although I fear you may not be joking!

The likes his thumbs,


beingaisha said...

Nice list! If I ever go on the lam, I'll come to your for an emergency kit...

O, wait, that's better stocked than my regular toy box... maybe I'm on the lam and don't know it? Could you send supplies just in case?



Suzanne said...

Not exactly a "survival kit." Would be an interesting team building exercise to sit down and privately prioritize the items, numbering them in ascending order with 1 being the most coveted, 2 the next most, and so on. Compare everyone's list and see who the real perverts are!

Donna said...

@Suzanne, What a novel idea, and what fun! But could be hard to rate since it isn't the toy so much as what we do with it that makes us happy pervs. :)

@aisha,The toys from SBBP come with a yak and herder. Mr X okay with that?

@WC, I can understand that both you and your brother would be attached to your thumbs and all the memories attached to them. lol

@Sam- Congrats on educating the locals on democracy, certainly a noble pursuit.