UCTMW ENTERPRISES, LLC
FROM: Mick Collins, Executive Editor
To: All Staff
Re: Employee Recognition Day
On behalf of our CEO, who is languishing in bed this morning, after a busy and demanding 24 hours or so (we will get to that later), I want to extend our thanks and appreciation for your efforts on behalf of UCTMW Enterprises in these last few months.
We have recently hit our 500th blog entry, and we could not have done it without you.
With your help, we have moved in little more than a year from a tiny internet start-up that was little more than a vanity publication with roots in sleepy little River City, to a media empire read world wide (by all of 700 some readers daily) with branch offices in the Mountain West and the hills of North Carolina.
We could not have gotten there alone….I suspect many of our readers would have long since moved on after repetitive stories of oral worship and cock cagings, but for the pithy and clever comments of our staff, and your well researched tutorials on matters such as ass fucking.
Now I am sure some of you might be asking “where’s the cash, Mick?” “What’s in it for us?”
But the CEO has taught me that what really matters to employees, what really gets them up and moving every day to put their nose to the corporate grindstone, is that sense of “fulfillment” and “recognition” for what they contribute.
So …. Drum roll please…. We are unveiling today (glance to the right) our first ever UCTMW masthead …. Identifying each of you as members of our management team.
Hopefully we can expand on that with little bios and avatars…. If you write and create them, of course. Don’t expect old Mick to do all the heavy lifting here!
And WC, you may ask yourself…. “Why am I now listed as part of “management”…. I don’t even have a lowly intern to go fetch me pizza and flash her thong at me….”
Well, as we’ve learned over the years…. If you are a “manager”, you can’t join or form a union, so kiss your pals at the International Brotherhood of Teamsters good bye, and forget about collecting overtime.
Now I know some of you also may be asking “after all our hard work, all we get is a listing on some dumb corporate masthead.”
Well, I know, that may not seem quite enough. After we sharpened our pencils and took a look at cash flow yesterday, your CEO, in her benevolence, agreed to the following incentive package to keep you coming back for more, and to ignore the siren songs of folks like Aisha, who has been encouraging Donna to break away and start her won blog:
• We won’t ask you to take yet another pay cut for at lest the next 6 months.
• We will not hike the percentage you pay for our generous health care package for the next year, though co-pays will now be $50 for each doctor visit.
• We will keep the UCTMW pension plan in place, rather than convert it to a worthless 401(k), though the retirement age will be increased to 75.
• This year mandatory no-pay furloughs will be limited to 1 month (of course we get to pick the month).
Finally, we have something that we know will thrill you and keep you as our loyal and happy employees. Each of you will be granted stock options in UCTMW Enterprises, LLC. Under this generous plan, if the stock price rises by 40% or more each year, you will share in the enormous profits. Of course, there is a small charge for enrollment in the plan. Our accountants will get the paperwork to you in the next few days. We accept Visa or Mastercard.
I wish our CEO had the time to send her personal good wishes to you this morning. But…. Well…. she has had quite a day. There was early morning wake up sex with the assistance of her Executive Editor yesterday morning. I would say with the 2 “prelim” orgasms, and maybe two more as she allowed me to fuck her, well …. That was a nice start.
Then her Slave was required to don his cage, which she locked up tightly.
As I was eating my breakfast, she was off on a nice long morning bike ride. And once she had showered, there was that morning “Editorial conference”, with our WC.
She checked in with me on the way to work.
“How many Mistress?”
“I kind of lost track, Slave…. Maybe 5 or so….”
Yow. A combination of the power tool and M’s seductive voice can be quite potent.
“He was working on a story about a trip to some kinky sex resort in Jamaica….”
I can’t wait until we get the expense account receipts for the research junket M takes for that story.
When we got home after a family dinner celebrating one of the teen’s birthday’s, both of us were dragging. But Mistress made sure she received ample worship in exchange for unlocking that cage.
Then, at around 5 am this morning, I felt her cuddling up close to me. Her hand reached around, and began to toy and tease with my cock, waking me from my slumber.
“Uhhhh…. What’s up Mistress?”
“I’m just making sure my cock is OK, Slave…I like to handle it this way… to remind myself that it’s all mine.”
“Of course it is, Mistress.”
Well you can imagine where this led. Soon I was suckling and squeezing some nipples, and then a finger was exploring her moist and fragrant folds. A
fter she came that way, I was begging for permission to fuck her. And, lucky Slave, she was amenable.
Having been sated once again, Mistress rolled over…. Intent on a little more rest.
“I’m looking forward to the blog this morning, Slave. You have a lot to write about.”