"Simone" and "Sam" have been forced to go on the Lam, after some sloppy security work exposed them to their potential "enemies". Fortunately, they've found help through the SBPP.
("Sex Bloggers Protection Program"). Follow their adventures here until its safe for them to resume their prior alter-egos.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Crisis Management

Mistress is an expert at “crisis management”, and by last night she seemed to have tamped down the threat to UCTMW’s balance sheet caused by the accidental cock freeze that had befallen our Western Correspondent.

The hamhanded instinct of this the General Counsel and Executive Editor was to hunker down, point fingers, and hire a private investigator, who would shadow M and take grainy, low resolution photos with a high power lense, through his office or bedroom window, to prove that his claim of partial disability was bogus. I figured it would not be long before he took matters into his own hands, so the speak.

I imagined surprising him at a hearing during cross-examination with the embarrassing “full mast” money shot, after his pitiful testimony about how his life was now in dick-less tatters.

But Mistress (and, I might add, several of our correspondents) were more inclined to slather the poor injured, suspected sandbagger with their own form of honey.

Ultimately, Mistress took the matter into her own sensuous and well manicured hands. I got a taste of her approach as I lounged in bed next to her last night, perusing the Times, as she responded to M’s request that she give him a call.

“So how are you feeling now, you poor boy….it must have been just awful. I was having nightmares thinking of that beautiful cock all frozen and lifeless.”

She was really laying it on. (Or is that lying, SFP?)

“Ohhh….. that’s nice…. Epic sex with B this morning. I guess things are feeling better then….”

Her sweet and solicitous tone of voice would make a hard nosed HR Manager puke, but it already seemed to have evoked a critical admission. Good job, Mistress!

“Slave, he says he still may need some ongoing physical therapy to make sure all the nerve endings are restored to full function….”

By now, I was with her program.

“Maybe we should fly you out there tonight, Mistress, so you can personally supervise his recovery… I mean he seemed so close to having lost that critical function…. We should spare no expense….”

I think she could tell I was being a tad bit sarcastic. I got an elbow in the ribs.

They talked about Donna’s generous offer to knit M and our other male staffers a warming “cock cozy”, to prevent further injury. After all once a body part has suffered frost bite it is all the more susceptible in the future. But of course, measurements would be required.

“He wants us to buy him a plane ticket for the fitting, Slave….”

“That only seems fair, Mistress.”

But Mistress was a little concerned that so many of our female readers seemed to take a little too much compassionate interest in the sad plight of his special occasion cock.

“Now M, I don’t want to hear that you are sending photos of your injured parts out to others we have come to know and love on the internet.”

Yes, it would be sad if one our competitors got the scoop when it comes to any public (or private) unveiling of his legendary instrument.

At this point, I had my fill of all the commentary on the sudden, unanticipated end of the Patriots’ season, and the emergence of the suddenly potent Jets. And those little wriggles that Mistress can’t suppress when she’s on the phone with M got the better of me.

We had already done worship, and some nice healthy fucking before dinner, but I figured a little pre-sleep stress relief for mistress couldn’t hurt.

So I made my move, sliding under the covers, feeling a bit like Matthew Brady, under the hood of that ancient camera he used to document the Civil War.

“M, he’s at it again. without even asking, the Slave is between my legs, just licking away.”

It seemed that M had gotten beyond his wheedling for a generous worker’s comp settlement, and was in the moment with us.

“Yes Master M…..”

“I understand, M…..”

It was clear that he was spinning one of his smutty scenarios for her, as I was plying my skills on her molten parts, which were suddenly quite needy and responsive.

Within moments, Mistress was gasping, her hips rising to meet me, through a series of spasms that seemed to go on for quite some time. Finally, she came down, satisfied, it seemed.

“That’s enough Slave…..”

I kept at it for a few seconds more though. I am a bit of an addict. Until, she usd her hand to push me away.

“He’s like a little suction cup down there, M.”

By now Mistress was tired, and signing off. And Slave was sleepy too. We snuggled up, lights out.

It seemed that Mistress had resolved our tempest in a frozen teapot, though they plan to confer again on Thursday morning to make sure that all of our Western Correspondent’s functions are GO.

Hmmm. I wonder if he plans to impose an embargo on our Publisher?

I better get one under the wire this morning, just in case.
(Illustrations courtesy of google images, category "frozen penis". Really.)


strivingforpeace said...

lol -- we'll have to ask my own personal grammarian.


sin said...

Creative googling Mick; what can't we find on the internet?

I vote for "laying" it on.

nilla said...

another hysterical posting from you, Mick! Egads, i'm just simply amazed at the frozen penis pix.

why didn't i think about googling that?

That is inspiring my head to begin spinning...uh know what *that* means. WC has earned his pay this week....


Suzanne said...

"frozen penis"??? I'll definitely have to google it myself to take a look at what you chose not to show us!

xantu said...

I have to add my kudos. The frozen penis pics made the post.

Donna said...

I suppose this means I'll have to return the yarn to the store today. *wiping tears from eyes*

UCTMW Enterprises Management Team said...

Donna, I think M is still lobbying for that plane ticket.

beingaisha said...

Awesome picture!!! Kind of mean not to let Donna do the penis cozies - other people might need them too!