"Simone" and "Sam" have been forced to go on the Lam, after some sloppy security work exposed them to their potential "enemies". Fortunately, they've found help through the SBPP.
("Sex Bloggers Protection Program"). Follow their adventures here until its safe for them to resume their prior alter-egos.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

HNT / A Tutorial on Butt Plugs from our Southern Correspondent

First, here are some photos of Mistress from our Switch day, this past Sunday. 

Lovely, bottom, don’t you think? Plus, as an HNT bonus, here is  a view of Molly after she just begged to wear those pegs, for the privilege of having all those orgasms.  (Today ‘Nilla has her pegs on too!, making it “DPT”, or “double peg Thursday” in this little corner of blogland.).
And lest you be concerned, things were on a more even keel here at the UCTMW World HQ yesterday .

Despite some angst about our Surly Teen #2, we had some satisfying if efficient morning sex, a stop by worship in my office before lunch, and then, last night, with my little white device firmly in place, some very hot good night fucking.

So Mistress got her usual supply or orgasms, and her Slave “came” out well too. Mistress reminded me that Wednesday used to be my Abstinence Day. But we seem to have fallen off that wagon. One can hardly complain.

Today Mistress is working from home, on a project that requires concentration. Avoiding the distractions of her office should be positive, and I hope she and M get a chance for some therapy of their own during the course of the day. She will need the stress relief.

But I am devoting the heft of today’s blog to a very entertaining submission from Donna, our Southern Correspondent. She has been of great help to us here at the UCTMW media empire, picking up the fallen “sword” of our Western Correspondent, who is still rehabilitating that frozen cock. (I am tempted to refer to it as his “special occasion frock”, but that might get MissBehavior and some of our other followers with similar interests confused, so I won’t go there.) Taking time from knitting those protective “cock cozies” for our male staff, she’s shown what an excellent writer she is as well.

Our WC’s Tutorial on First Time Anal Sex, continues to generate clicks here at UCTMW, and this contribution from Donna makes an excellent reading companion. It could  be particularly helpful to Suzanne over at ALL Mine, should she lose her Super Bowl bet to Jay:

Considering your WC's lingering interest, experience and longing concerning anal sex, it doesn't take a visit to the local psychic to see long hours spent with butt plugs in your... future, probably for both of you. While Mick has written about your wonderful strap-on, hours spent in an up close and personal relationship with a butt plug can...alter the way one walks and talks if not done properly. The snip below is from an Australian blog I enjoy, “Down the Rabbit Hole”. I wish I had read a handy-dandy guide like this before doing my stubborn "I can take it" routine.

If this is repeat or old hat information for you, my apologies. However, better too much than not enough info when talking about delicate tissues.

From a purely psychological standpoint, it might be interesting to know about the potty training procedures of WC's mother. I would be among the first to raise my hand and say that anal sex is a wonderful thing. However, the enthusiasm of WC and the thumbs up approach of his brother lead me to wonder whether their mother had one of those expensive musical potty chairs or offered candy or cash for #2 accomplishments beginning a positive association with the human butt that has lasted through the years. Just wondering.

I know, I know, some friends send Hallmark greeting cards to show they care. I, on the other hand, have always leaned toward the more practical. I started to write a greeting card style poem to go with this info, but (husband) Bill said he thought perhaps you have suffered enough with the email alone. Sometimes he is more humorous than others.

Long term butt plug wearing
This is being posted because it is one of those things that people ask about frequently and this is an easier way of doing it... for one small slave at any rate. Some of this stuff is common knowledge and some of it is from trial and error so may not be universal. It is also worth mentioning that some of it is less than glamorous so you have been warned. Err... that means stop reading now if you are squeamish...
·         Stainless steel is best for long term wear and there are plenty to choose from.
·         Be aware that as your body gets used to them you may need to select a larger size, particularly if you are doing this to make anal sex easier. As they are expensive you might want to give this some consideration before ordering that cute little one.
·         If you are wearing them 24/7 give some thought to the shape of your arse and the handle. The gems are pretty, but are wider than the Njoy.
·         Don’t be shy; use it, particularly in the beginning
·         Get a good silicone based one rather than water. It lasts longer and doesn’t wash off so easily. “Back Door” by Pjur is the best one has found to date.
·         Be sensible... work up to it. Don’t just ram the thing in and hope for the best. Wear it for a short time and increase it.
·         If it hurts take it out and try again later
·         Your body produces a lot of it and you don’t realise how much until it can’t get out easily.
·         If it builds up you will get cramps. Take it out for a while or wiggle it so the gas can escape.
·         As the body gets used to the plug it will learn how to work around it. As the swelling goes down it will get easier.
·         Are fun things to do but you don’t have to do a full one every time. It is much kinder to the body in the long run as continual enemas can strip out the natural lining of the bowel and you can get a lazy bowel... it stops contracting to expel.
·         Use a bulb type enema (rectal syringe) standing up to give a quick flush where you need it and cause less problems
Diet and exercise:
You thought you were safe didn’t you J
·         It is in your best interest to keep a good diet and exercise program with plenty of water. You want nice firm stools that come out cleanly rather than leaving a mess you have to clean up every time.
·         The best way to do this is make sure you eat plenty of fibre and drink plenty of water. Stay away from foods that upset your stomach... it is a kindness
·         Do take the damn things out somewhere safe. If you drop one of them down a toilet they will crack the bowl.
·         They are heavy and slippery when removed and come out faster than you think...
·         Stainless steel can be washed easily and they can be sterilized... do it on a regular basis
·         They cannot fall in or out if they have a good base
·         If it is cold, warm it first under some hot water... it cuts down on cramping
·         The 2.0 is not for the faint-hearted or the novice... there are some issues with both the length of the handle which renders it hard to sit on, and that even with the fluting on the side venting gas is difficult.

Thanks for these good words of advice, Donna. And I know all our readers look forward to our WC’s response about his potty training days.

Now I better go up stairs and put on the ring for my cock cage. Since we will not be driving to work together today, it's in the cage for this Slave.


WC said...

Hey Donna,

Truth be told I have no memory of my mothers potty training procedures, but you could be right. It is true that both my brother and I have life long interest in anal sex.

Just the other day i told Molly, (with a capital M) that we should go internet shopping for a suitable butt plug for her to wear along with her butterfly or for wear durning our "dates."

Now thanks to all that good information from Donna I think we will go the stainless steel rout. That way the evil little device could be stored in the freezer when not being used. lol

The, still having my very serious injury belittled by UCTMW's corporate council Mick Collins,


Thank god the CEO, of this media empire, has a heart.

beingaisha said...

Nice post, Mick, glad things are back to normal. Donna - your contribution is very helpful! Since i've never used a butt plug, i'll have to bookmark this post! Not that i see one in my future any time soon either...) But it will probably come in handy some day, right?


UCTMW Enterprises Management Team said...

Hey Guys,
I too loved Donna's contribution to our award-winning pub. WC and I have never talked about his mom's potty training regime. I am certain that we now will. (haha). Thanks too my introducing the freezer concept to WC (not)...and yes WC -- the CEO has a big heart.

MissBehaviour said...

Nice to see that (Mm)olly is going to give some pleasant confusion, and that the astute and observant, which might just possibly apply to WC, are picking up on the possibilities.

Watching Diane's blog it's distinctly possible that there might be contemporaneous (Mm)olly butt-pluggery. Now won't that be fun!


Donna said...


It may seem that I am singling you out and, indeed, I am. Really, this Gentle Southern Lady must protest even joking about chilling down a stainless steel butt plug! While a chilled vaginal dildo can bring a shiver of delight and fun to a party, a chilled butt plug brings only long lasting, sometimes severe cramping that could lead a person to closing off that particular southern passage to all further explorations. Now you wouldn't want that to happen would you?

While your brother would most likely be pleased to accompany you, I sincerely doubt you would wish to be named in any legal situations involving the professional testimony of a score of proctologists. Remember Jack Elam in Smokey and the Bandit?

Please note that in the tutorial above the suggestion made concerning warming butt plug.

Oh, and WC, are you one of those much beloved and respected Doms who believes in experiencing at least once anything they would ask their subs to experience? Just wondering.

Back to the knitting needles,

Donna said...

Oh, correction, it wasn't Smokey and the Bandit, it was that classic and much loved (by my husband) film Cannon Ball Run. Same cast, similar plots, but different titles.


WC said...

Donna you are too too funny!

I have defiantly put ice cubes in both orifices but never tried a frozen stainless steel butt plug. The was no such thing (as far as I know) back in the day before I was married. But I will take your advise and and only put the frozen butt plug up our CEO's vagina. I feel certain she will be very grateful , that because of you, the orifices were switched. She should sent you a thank you note, I will see the she does.

Between you (frozen steel butt plug in her vagina) and me (clothes pins on her nipples ) she will certainly be winning a wheedling, as she is prone to do according the Mick Collins. But slave its too cold out from under the covers. 22 funny.

The very amused ,

and ever lazy,


SometimesSpanked said...

Yes, Molly's butt is delightful! :)

I've worn a stainless steel butt-plug, definitely fun. Never tried "icing" it though..hmmm!